National Association of Military Moms and Spouses

I am dealing with our first seperation and must say it is hard.  How do you Ladies deal?

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I stay as busy as I can. With school, work, two kids, and two dogs, it's pretty easy to do. But when the girls go to bed and my day is over, the house is quiet, and I crawl into bed alone, that's when it hits me the most. I've learned to take the time my husband is away to explore me -- what do I like to do? What interests me now a days? It's easy to lose yourself in this life, especially when you become a mom, so I've found new things to keep me occupied and new hobbies that I can hopefully get my husband involved with when he comes home. :]
I know how it is. I feel sometimes things become routine. I spend time with our daughter, go to work and then come home and spend time with her. I try to do something different each week though. But I do have moments where it seems like I am all alone. But my Husband makes things as easy as possible for me.
This is my first deployment with my hubby as well. We have had small separations before, but this one will be anywhere between 7 and 9 months. It's hard. And, I have 2 kids, 4 and 6, in school . I also became a stay at home mom for the first time and this is an adjustment and to top it all off we found out I was pregnant with our first child 3 weeks before he left. Talk about hormones!!! I agree with both of you ladies, though. It has been 102 days, not that I am counting! And, I have learned to stay as busy as possible. Cooking and baking has helped, also the usual chores of dinner, dishes, laundry, homework, etc....
The end of the day is definitely the hardest part. But, I try to make sure I am super tired so I don't lay there awake thinking about him forever. It's super hard, but getting a little easier. Having you ladies to talk to definitely helps!
I was married 3 months before he left for his first deployment. We didn't have phones or email. We had to rely on regular mail and phone calls when he pulled into port. I went to school and work everyday. We didn't have kids yet. If you stay busy, the days move fast. Hopefully you have some friends you have made within the command. If not you can start going to the FRG meetings to meet some of them. Just don't sit at home dwelling. You are a strong woman to even marry into the Navy. My daughter and I just finished dealing with a one year GSA and that was the toughest thing ever. I was praying for a normal ship deployment. Don't put too much on your plate. If you have kids, don't run all over town wth extracurriular activites. You will just overwhelm yourself. Stay positive, find others who are just as positive. Stay away from those with negative attitudes toward the command.
The first few months of the first deployment drove me nuts because I was pregnant. I spent a lot of time with friends and keeping active, but at the end of the day, it was rough. To be honest, the only thing that really helped me was when my son was born. After that, the time flew by, and the next deployment was a breeze!
Hi Everyone,

I just joined the group. I saw this post about surviving deployments. My husband is on his 7th deployment. They never get easier, you just become better at staying busy. I wrote a book for children ages 0-6 that helps a lot with helping them understand deployment. I know it doesn't fix all of the problems but it talks a lot about what goes on during and after deployment. I hope it helps in some small way. Good luck and if I can ever help let me know. Here is book website just in case you want to look.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Deployment/Santina-Rivera/e/978145...
itm=1&USRI=deployment%2c+santina+rivera
let me know if any of you all in San Diego want to get together!  I'm new to this site and moved to SD less then 2 years ago...I'm back in forth from LA to SD because I stay busy by working....I would spend most of my time with my hubby and some of his friends, but it has been so lonely since he has been deployed to Afghan....
Hi my name is Brianna Gillaspie. My husband is in the navy. He is an ET Nav on a sub. We just went through our first deployment and boy was it tough. We were barely married 3 months when he left. My best advice to help time pass quicker is to keep busy! Go to church, have get togethers with friends, join a support group like this, and look into volunteer work or get into some hobbies. I those really helped me a ton! Just stay strong and trust me when the time passes and he comes home, it will be so worth it! :)

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